No ‘But’s

L keeps me grounded in my dreams. I talk to him whenever I need to get my perspective back up in the clouds I leave behind to tread the earth. I tell him I’m scared about next year – I don’t really know what I’m going to be doing. This doesn’t always bother me – I don’t understand money like everyone else does – but every now and then I have to put on a brave face to everyone else who’s responsible and organised (like me), who knows exactly what they’re doing (unlike me).

He’s far less concerned about plans and structure. There’s no pretending with him. He’s also far less concerned about responsibilities and ties.

And it’s him who reminds me to dream:
what would you do next year if you could, TFP, if you didn’t have to worry about your friends, and your family, and everyone else here
– But
No Buts. what would you be doing? where would you go?.
– I’d go… I’d go [and then the first thing that pops into my head] travelling in South America.
Good. Go teach English in South America!
– And then you’ll come join me?
Yes. Together.

We sit there in silence, both knowing that this probably won’t happen.

Or maybe, it’s just me.


~ by translating for peas on June 29, 2010.

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